News Corp to Buy F1!

July 24, 2014: Spokesperson Harper Collins announced today that Rupert Murdock (Net worth $13.7B) has engaged Bernie Ecclestone (Net worth $4.2B) and CVC Capital Partners in a preliminary discussion to purchase Formula One Group, the company which owns and controls F1.

“As a young man I raced a mini rather successfully against Jim Clark and Graham Hill, Rupert said. “I always felt that I could be World Champion if I had the time. Once we have closed this deal I will arrange to drive for my friend Dietrich Mateschitz (Net worth $5.3B) at Red Bull and make my dream of winning the World Driving Championship come true” said the 82 year old. “Then I will merge F1 with NASCAR, which I already own, cut the driver’s salaries and make them race every day.” He went on.

The recently divorced Billionaire was accompanied at the announcement party by his latest companion, recently retired CBS correspondent Barbara Walters. “The man is remarkable” she was heard to mumble.

Asked for a comment, Bernie was heard to say, “The man is remarkable”.

Oofy Prosser
MMR Correspondent